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In December of 2006, I attended Marshall Sylver’s “The Turning Point.” At the suggestion of a trusted mentor, Skip Lacour, I invested several hundred dollars to attend an event I knew nothing about. Marshall, a hypnotist, and self-professed millionaire maker with a flashy swagger seemed like an entertainer, though my expectations were low for any value beyond that. Skip Lacour, a 6-time national drug free bodybuilding champion, author, writer and motivational speaker was working along side Marshall on his seminar circuit which travels the country. Skip is a legendary athlete that I admired and wished to emulate. His spartan like dedication and resilience in such a thankless sport gave him a lot of street credit. In truth, I believed that meeting Skip would be more valuable than anything Marshall would ever teach me. Both men would prove to be invaluable influences and resources for shaping my future.
The morning of the seminar came and I was sitting in the first few rows off of stage left. Projector screens stood adjacent to each side of the stage. A clip from The Karate Kid flashed on and it was the scene where Mr. Miyagi teaches Daniel Larusso how to sand the floor, paint the fence, and “wax on, wax off.” At the beginning of the scene, Daniel begs Mr. Miyagi to teach him karate. Mr. Myagi demands “I say, you do, NO question.” Mr. Miyagi puts Daniel through 3 exhausting days of thankless manual labor with only minutes of instruction on how to even complete the tasks. Daniel doesn’t see the lesson in any of the work. In the end of the scene he is angry and arguing with his sensei to teach him how to fight, not to a slave. Mr. Miyagi unleashes a flurry of kicks and punches at Daniel who unconsciously blocks each and every one of them using the basic lessons he learned from sand the floor, paint the fence, and wax on wax off. With the glazed look of a humbled teenager, he stands silently and respectfully before his teacher. The movements had become part of him. He didn’t have to think how to react. They bow to one another and the scene ends.
In order for us to create an abundant life, we must adopt powerful actions and behaviors and transform to a level of unconscious competence. These qualities and characteristics must be etched in our being. As the projectors go white, Marshall appears from the back of the room and comes on over the loud speaker. “I say, you do, no question” resonates from the surround sound. Marshall has a unique and powerful voice and makes a massive entrance. Once again, he bellows “I say, you do, no question.” Dressed in a silver suit, that screams “custom made,” he walks to the front of the room and stands with a commanding and dominant presence on stage. He speaks with a tonality and pitch I’ve never heard. His voice is so clear, suggestive and impressive that everyone in the room is at full attention. At that moment, I knew I was in for an incredible and life changing weekend. This man had something to offer me and I was taking notes.
Was this just another “ra ra” session? Or would this truly help take me from a Chiropractic student to a successful entrepreneur and leader within my profession? Over the course of those two days in 2006, I learned lessons that cannot be undone. “A mind once expanded can never contract,” being one of Marshall’s token phrases. He was right. Once I stepped up my level of thinking to this higher level, I experienced a change in consciousness. The bell had been rung. The room was filled with over 1,000 people each paying $600-$1500 to attend. He asked “Did anybody do the math” to emphasize the amount of money he was making in just two days of work. For most its unimaginable. We were taught systematically to understand and believe that success is possible and that he possessed the tools necessary to bridge the gap from ordinary to extraordinary. I realized then and there that Marshall was not successful from genetics or environmental reasons. He grew up with 8 brothers and sisters, no father and a mother who worked 3 jobs to raise them. Marshall was a product of focus, vision and massive action. Millionaires and billionaires take action. They take massive risk when others sit idly by waiting for better times and calmer waters.
Seeing Marshall on stage excited me. I felt my heart race and my entrepreneurial emotions stir. His communication skills were sharp and articulate and it was impossible to not to feel challenged. It was like he was speaking to me and through me it hurt so good. He wanted us to embrace these emotions and take action on them. People always buy on emotion and back their emotions up with logic. He would present various offers for other events and seminars throughout the weekend ranging in prices from $5,000 for the millionaire mentorship program up to $30,000 for personal coaching in his 12,000 sq’ mansion. People with credit cards in hand literally ran to the table spending thousands and thousands of dollars to get more of what he had to teach. Myself included. As a broke student, I understood that I had a lot more to learn. With no clear way of how I would pay the money back, I put $5,000 on my credit card to go to the Millionaire Mentorship Program (MMP). This was the single largest purchase of my life and it was the day I learned to embrace massive risk. When we can control our state during periods of incredible stress, savor the fear, and stomach the angst, we grow FAST! That weekend I broke a board with my bare hand. I ate fire without getting burned. At the MMP I walked barefoot across an 8′ bed of broken glass. The lessons were ingrained. Follow instructions. Study the patterns of people who have been successful before. They are reproducible. Control your breathing. Look past your target. Trust your coach. Believe that the impossible is possible. The biggest lesson was realize now that the only thing that could stop me from doing the impossible was my beliefs. Did I believe I could eat fire? Was it possible to walk on broken glass? Where did my limiting beliefs come from? Once again mothers, fathers, teachers, preachers and big pharma.
That weekend spent learning Marshall’s insider secrets of massive wealth, influence and success correlates well with a lesson I learned elsewhere called “Be, Do, Have.” As a 25 year old student, I wanted what Marshall “have.” Pardon the poor grammar, in a moment it will be clear what I am referring to. I wanted to “have” the big mansion on the beach in San Diego. I pictured myself in the private jet flying all over the world to speak and empower people to take massive risk just like I had. The Rolls Royce which he stood so arrogantly against in the photo was was mine to have!
Steven Covey teaches to always start with the end in mind. Decide exactly what you want first and then work backwords. Fuzzy targets don’t get hit so we must be specific. I outlined this elaborate life for myself on paper to determine what I wanted to “have.”
The first question I needed to ask is who does Marshall “be.” All too often our desire to “have” disillusions us from what it takes to get there in the first place. All too often we do things out of order. How many people say they want to make a million dollars this year? How many would actually be willing to work that hard, or would want to embrace the kind of stress it takes to get there? We forget that there is an order to the process. To “have,” we must first “be,” then “do.” Only then can we “have.” We have been lead to believe that we must “do,” so we can “have,” and then we will “be.” Sorry but it doesn’t work this way. So who is Marshall? What does he “be.” This is a fundamental question I had to answer for myself in order to figure out how to become successful like him, not to become him. Is it safe to say he is a person of tremendous confidence? Yes. Does he project massive value? Yes. Is he comfortable accepting enormous amounts of money for his products and services? Absolutely!! Does he believe whole-heartedly that he is helping his students? Without a doubt. Is it also fair to say that it might be tough to become a successful multi-millionaire without first raising my own self-confidence, value, and comfort with accepting money for my own outstanding services? No doubt!
Clearly Marshall “be” confident, influential, persuasive, and extraordinarily comfortable receiving money. When he sells, he sells as if he is doing the buyer a favor. But what is his day like? Remember millionaires and billionaires think differently. They “do” differently. First and foremost, they do not waste time. If they are worth $1,000’s/hour, they don’t do $100 work themselves. Quite simply, they don’t trade pennies for dollars. His first piece of advice was get a maid. Stop wasting time folding towels and vacuuming. The wealthy have the same 24 hours as a pauper, they simply use their time differently. They squeeze the juice out of every day. Delegate everything to create the most opportunity for working on your own wealth vehicle. Stop getting bogged down in the minutia. Why does Marshall pay $50,000 to fly privately? His answer, my answer, and your answer: “What is the most highly effective use of my time?” He can’t stand getting to the airport 2 hours early, waiting in the security lines, only to have his baggage lost. He likes to takeoff with his seat back, tray table down and a drink in his hand. Flying privately saves time, lowers his stress and allows him to be more creative and productive. His time is so valuable that flying privately allows him to make him more money.
In order to “have” you must first define clearly what it is you want. What do YOU want? More money? Massive wealth? How much? More time off? What would you do with it? A healthier life? What would that feel like and how would you do things differently? Maybe you just want less pain? What does a person with less pain than you do differently? Do you think they eat, move and think differently? I guarantee it! Do you want to see Europe, Hawaii, maybe Australia? Define it, see your future, and start ASKING for what you want now. Start studying people that have what you want and ask yourself who they “be.” Fuzzy targets don’t get hit folks. We’ve been deceived as children. Our mothers, fathers, teachers, preachers and big pharma flat out lied to us. They thought they were helping us and protecting us. They raised us to be good boys and girls. They taught us to mind our manners and do as we’re told. We learned that when you are sick you take a pill or you drink some medicine. When you get hurt or really sick you have surgery. What were we taught about money? “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” “Do you think we are rich.” “Do you think we are made of money.” “We don’t live like that.”
We were programmed to be poor. We were were taught unconsciously to take no responsibility for our own health, wealth or our future. We learned we need to go to school, grow up, get a degree so “hopefully” we can get a “good job” working for somebody else. I wonder what that somebody else’s mom and dad taught them growing up? I’ll bet it was different than you and me. Did anybody ever tell us we should grow up and create? Did they ever say, “do not go to college so you can get a job. Grow up and be extraordinary!” We were never given permission! “They” never said its o.k. to think for ourselves, to create and to become abundantly wealthy, abundantly healthy and forever in control of our own lives.
Marshall learned this lesson out of pain. He didn’t “have” anything growing up. He knew in order for things to change, he HAD to change. He had to “be” somebody different on a fundamental level. People like Tony Robbins, Zig Ziglar, Steven Covey, Oprah Winfrey, Donald Trump, Bill Gates and Warren Buffet figured it out too. They understand that our experiences shape our beliefs and our beliefs dictate our behaviors. In order to change our beliefs about money, health, and happiness we must change our thoughts. We must adopt more qualities, actions and beliefs of those we wish to emulate.
As an exercise, outline on a piece of paper everything you wish to have in life. Then clearly define who the person that has those things “be.” Write out what it is they “do.” Remember, success leaves clues. There is no reason to complicate the process by reinventing what has already been done laid out for you. Last, ask yourself why you want to “have.” Without a clear why to drive you, your likelihood of success and abundance is little more than hoping. Behind hope there is often little to no action. “Be,” “Do” and you can truly “Have” whatever it is you want in any aspect of your life. I am Dr. Shaun Stuto and I wish you a life of abundance.
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write by Iolanthe